I have talked about a principle from The Success Principles by Jack Canfield, called E+R=O, taking 100% responsibility for your actions. This powerful, life-altering principle, states that your point of power, or control, is your response to events in your life. Using the formula, the E is for the Event, the R is for your Response, and the O is the Outcome. In order to get a different outcome (or to influence the Outcome), the only thing you can control is the R, your response. The E, event, is what it is, it is out of your control. Therefore, your point of power for changing the outcome to any situation is to control your Response to the event.
Recently, I was in a conversation with someone and I realized something so amazing while speaking to them. They had not decided who they were going to be in a specific type of situation. For example, every time I go to visit or speak to a new corporate client, I have already decided who I am going to be in that situation - smart, strong, caring, listening, and confident. That version of Amina shows up. That version of Amina dresses a certain way, speaks about certain things, and asks specific questions. The silly, fun side of me does not show up to the first meeting. The kind, professional does. I know exactly who I am in that situation. I know what I need to do and what parts of myself need to be fully present in that moment. My spiritual, connected side is also totally present, but that is not the side I begin the conversation with, it is the side I use to prepare for the initial conversation.
Have you thought about who you are (or are going to be) in certain situations?
What about if there is a family emergency? Who are you going to be in that situation? The one that offers prayers and support from a far? The one that writes a check immediately? The one that drops everything, shows up, and runs the show?
At a job interview? With your kids/spouse? When things don't go your way? When you win the lottery? Which of your unique skills are you stepping forward with in each of those situations? Which version of your authentic self shows up in each of these situations?
Most importantly, who are you when you feel attacked? Who are you when you feel like life handed you a huge bag of lemons? Do you use those events to allow a different version of yourself to step forward? Do you allow a victim mentality in those cases? Do you allow a complaining, negative side of you to take center stage?
There is no right or wrong answer. There is just a formula that works every time, E+R=O. However your respond to that situation influences the outcome. Take a moment to look at situations in your life where the best qualities of who you are shine through and situations where the less-than-best qualities of who you are step forward. If you take a moment to really think of these, then ask yourself, how can I allow a moment of pause to allow some of my better qualities to step forward in these situations?
There are people who really, really, really annoy me. I don't know why, they just do. And, in those situations, my "too good for you" qualities jump forward so quickly it would make your head spin. The practice for the month of December in Adventures with Amina is to keep your peace in every situation. Another way of saying that is to linger in the pause. There is a moment between the event and your response to the event, where you get to make a decision. For most of us, we are moving so fast, and on such auto-pilot that we miss this moment much more often than we catch it. Some of us even believe that "we can't help it, it just happens." But, that is not true. We all have an option to choose again. And, I believe, until you choose the path of peace, you will keep facing the same situation over and over again. Everything in life repeats until the lesson is learned. And, the only way to "learn the lesson" is to be able to see the situation in a different way. In order to see the situation differently, you have to make a different decision in that moment of pause. And, the only way to do that, is to actually catch the moment of peace/pause, so you have the ability to make a different decision. This month, we are going to focus on practices to help increase our awareness of the fact that the moment of peace (the moment of pause) is ALWAYS available to us.
Yesterday, I was having a difficult conversation with my friend. The situation they were in was uncomfortable and I felt myself getting annoyed and frustrated, wanting them to make a different choice and knowing they wouldn't. While listening (not really, I was not fully present, I was triggered), I looked up and saw a prayer on my wall and read it silently to myself. All of a sudden, the entire room changed. I realized, all is truly well. Life is truly good. And, that this situation is perfect and unfolding perfectly. I quickly relayed my confidence in my friend's ability to handle this situation perfect, and got off the phone! I do not need to linger in this situation and figure it out! There is NOTHING to figure out! There is no action required from me. The only thing I needed to do was be present and see my friend and the situation as perfect. Once I was able to catch a moment of pause, I saw that. It was so easy. That is the power to tuning into peace at any moment.
Want to improve your peace muscle? Want to be able to hear news reports and stay at a level of peace? Want to be able to see you are ok no matter what is happening to you or around you, because you are truly ok at all times. Join me in Adventures in Amina during December for a free 30 day Peace practice. Peace is a muscle like any other. And, the only way to build it is to do the practices. This month, I am offering you 30 days of peace practices that are easy and impactful. Like any exercise, the more you do the quicker you will see the result, yet, any amount of effort is rewarded. Join us this month for a consistent daily morning practice for each of the 30 days, followed by a different focus practice for each day to increase your personal level of peace.
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Ever since I learned to manifest, I learned that there are "religious" people who believe that manifesting is not aligned to have a spiritual faith. I have never understood that. In my mind, these two are not in conflict. Here are the reasons why.
1. What you want, wants you. God does not put a desire in your heart, without giving you a way to achieve it.
God is not out to "get" you. You love the things you love and want the things you want because of every single life experience you have had has lead you to these conclusions. So, there is no "your" way vs. "God's" way - it is the same outcome, though, it could have vastly different paths. But, that is no different than when you ask for what you want and the Universe delivers it in its own way. You do not get to control the "how" but the "what" comes from your heart, which is tied to a higher power.
2. Handing it over to God vs. Manifesting
This is where things get SO fun! Ok... so, there is this feeling of I can either do what God asks of me or I can be happy. Like the two are in conflict with one another. Let's look at that belief.
Have your ever really, really, really wanted something because you knew it would be the best thing or make you happy and it turned out to be, well, not-so-great. Or, have you ever done something that you had to and you knew it would be terrible and it turned out to be amazing?
Welcome to life. None of us are in control and none of us know what amazing plan is unfolding for us. What about when something "terrible" happened and it turned out to be a blessing in disguise?
The reason this one is hard is because we believe we are in control. However, if you admit, you are not in control and that in fact, life would work a heck of a lot better, if a higher power (your higher self, God) was in charge, then there is no conflict.
My favorite way to do this is to do the morning prayer from a Course in Miracles, where you hand your day over to God. This is an understanding that the way God/Higher Power has your day unfold is much better than anything you can come up with for you to get not necessarily "what you want" but "what you need".
Where would you have me go? What would you have me to? What would you have me say and to whom?
When you hand your day over, what you will see is the "how" on the things you want, start to take care of themselves. You can be clear on the "what". Then, hand the day over. And, watch miracles on "how" what you want shows up. And, in some cases, you will see that you get something even better than the thing you thought you wanted.
Most importantly, life gets a heck of a lot easier. Instead of getting out there and making it happen, you can hand it over and allow it to be delivered. There is this feeling that everything will go to h*** if you hand your day over to a higher power. But, what happens is life gets a whole bunch easier and you get what you want easier than you ever have before.
Sometimes, it is good for us Master Manifestors to look at what we are manifesting and ensure we are applying some of the basics to our manifesting. These are some of the sly basics that can sneak up on you without your knowing it!
1. Be aware of why you are talking about what you are talking about.
Are you always talking about "that thing" the one that you really want to manifest? Sometimes this can be good, but many times, this is a sly way to not release what you want to the Universe. Picture yourself at a coffee shop. You order. You now have to wait patiently for your drink. Instead of just looking at your phone, chatting with the person next to you, or reading the headlines on the paper sitting right there, you keep doing this instead, "I am so grateful that I am going to get coffee. I love coffee! Um... this coffee is so yummy... I am acting as if I have the coffee right now! This coffee is going to be the best coffee I have ever had!" Ok... so none of those things are "wrong". They, in fact, are great manifesting techniques. However, you can see how its a bit over the top for a cup of coffee, that you just ordered. That's how EVERYTHING you manifest looks like to the Universe... it looks like you ordered a cup of coffee. So... there is not a need to keep talking about it. The only reason to talk about it is to help your own subconscious mind remove any blocks to believing the "coffee" is coming. Again, there are some time for that... but there are many more times to order your "coffee" and move on to another activity.
2. Are you manifesting what you don't want?
Most of us know this, but can accidently forget. Sometimes the thing that we are manifesting results in us picturing the thing we do not want. Unfortunately, that is sending energy to that which you do not want, instead of what you do want.
Quick review: Your mind has the conscious and subconscious parts. Your subconscious mind thiks in picture. So, when you say you want to be debt free... what does your mind picture? A big 'ole pile of DEBT! What about, "I want to lose weight" - you got it, your mind pictures weight. A general rule of thumb in manifesting is you do not want to be anything-free, or have a negative word (like non, not, etc).
Check your manifestations and make sure they are in the positive. Here are some quick changes.
This is a common issue, even for us Master Manifestors. Sometimes, by accident, we focus on not getting something instead of getting clear on what it would look and feel like when we have what we DO want. Take a quick look at your manifestations and ensure you are telling the Universe exactly what you DO want.
! I LOVE to manifest. I truly love it. I started manifesting, like many people, after watching the movie, The Secret. In the movie, I heard many people, including Jack Canfield, speak about the power of the Law of Attraction (LOA for short) and how to manifest anything you want into being. He talked about choosing one thing, that is so big, that if you achieve it, you know this principle works. I chose to have someone propose to me. Don't judge! I was new to this whole thing, and I really wanted to get married! So, that is what I chose. That was in August. I was not dating anyone and did not have a prospect on the scene. Through a series of crazy events, during the month of November (same year, so 3 months later), I had two men propose to me. I learned the second rule of the Law of Attraction, which is, "holy crap this stuff works, so be clear and specific on what you really want!" Turns out, I did not just want someone to propose to me, I wanted the right someone to propose to me.
I tell this story, because, my path to becoming a Master Manifestor, was by throwing things out there I wanted and totally did not believe were possible. And, because I had faith that this worked, and also had no clue how to really do it, I just kept practicing. There is a Target near my house in Maryland; it is my happy place. When I am not happy, I drive to Target. Within 3 minutes of entering the store, I am happy again. There is a big parking garage across the street that I do not love. Maybe you know how this goes, when you are not happy, and then to get happy, you have to do something that makes you not happy... it puts a damper on the whole happiness activity! But, this parking garage has a handful of street level spots - easy in and out and quick entry to Target. For ages, I would go to the garage and NEVER find an open spot in this little area. Then, I watched the Secret. A man talked about using the Law of Attraction to find parking spots and I thought of Target. Since that day, I almost always (I'd guestimate 99% of the time) get parking spots in that one area near Target. I am talking Black Friday, Day after Christmas, Saturday morning or afternoon, almost always.
The number one mistake I see people making with applying the Law of Attraction to their lives is that they make it too hard. I started out by wanting to be proposed to and... parking spots. Had I only done wanting someone to propose to me, I don't think I would be a Master Manifestor today. I had to add in the "small" stuff and get wins to keep it going. Here is my question to you - if you practice the Law of Attraction, when was the last time you used it to just have a little fun?
These days, I manifest all kinds of crazy things - little and big. People calling me back, flowers, $70K, new contracts, etc. But, I still have fun with manifesting almost daily! I still manifest great parking, green lights, a song to come on the radio. And, the other night, I had a LOT of fun with my manifesting. We went to see a play and it was in a building that also had a bar, which hada video gambling machine. I saw this man sitting at one intensely playing. I had seen these before and played once, just to try it. And, it did not work out well, but I had read someone you have to play the machine someone else lost at to win, and this man's expression told me, he was losing. So... I thought, I'll try it out! I vowed to spend no more than $5 and just to HAVE FUN! I put $1 in the machine and was down to .02 cents left, when I won and was now up to .07 cents. Then, I stopped, and said, "I am a Master Manifestor, what do I want to create here?". I decided, I wanted my dollar back (rookie manifesting move... but I was totally not attached to that - should have gone for $10!). Played again, lost, played again, won, up to .53 cents (wow!), played a few more times and BAM - up to $1.05! I cashed out since I met my goal. That's a key too - I declared what I wanted. When I got it, I was thrilled, celebrated and moved on!
I told the friends we were with, and they couldn't believe how "lucky" I was (it's not luck, its the LOA). Now, they wanted to try, they put a dollar in, and I decided to put a dollar in with them (for them to use) but it somehow turned into us playing together. Every time I hit the button, we would go up! I stopped and said to my friend, "Wait! What do you want to manifest here?" He wanted to manifest $10 and I thought, and so it is and so it shall be! Long story short, I ended the night with $8 (my half) from my $1 investment (I got my first dollar back so from my second dollar investment). We won $16 that night in total! He spent $2, I spent $1. And.. I had fun. I realized, us Master Manifestors should be playing the lottery more often ;) Last night, I played a game of darts and I did the same thing. I manifested winning. I played with a bunch of seasoned dart players, mine, normally, bounce off the board. I was trailing the entire time, and then in one hand, I miraculously hit all the numbers and WON! And, again, most importantly, I had FUN!
What is the result of all of this fun? Today, when I put out big things I want to create this week, it is a done deal. It is done because my manifesting vibe is so high. I have complete confidence in my ability, over Video Gambling and a darts game. Two things that are not normal activities for me but that I had fun doing. I applied my manifesting skills in a fun way and it paid off. And, now, I feel like I am on a manifesting roll and everything I touch turns to gold!
Before I manifested my way into Times Square for New Year's Eve, a contract with Disney, the hottest guy in the room to walk over to me and ask me out, 10K out of the blue, and a free Disney cruise, I was manifesting parking spaces at Target which delighted me no end. Use your manifesting skills to have some fun and watch the little (and big) things pour in and everything you touch turn to gold!
As I think back on my journey, I think to the car ride where my eldest sister introduced me to the movie, The Secret. It was the first time I heard Jack Canfield speak and he talked about choosing to manifest something so big it would change your life, and I chose getting proposed to. That one event, changed my entire life. I signed up for his Breakthrough to Success training, the same year, went through his Train the Trainer program and within that year, my entire life looked completely different (including moving from MD to CA)!
I was honored to get to see a pre-screening of Soul of Success, the movie about Jack Canfield's Life. I cried numerous times. I invite each of you to get to know this extraordinary man. I know him as, "Jack Canfield". His story, takes you back to when he was just Jack, applying these principles, just like you and me and having wins and losses along the way. And, how by practicing all the principles we talk about he became, "The Jack Canfield" that we know and love.
You can register for a free screening for this movie here.
Hi! Welcome to my blog, Lunch with Cinderella. I love writing about my life experiences and the fact that they may help spur some cool experiences of your own. If you are here, leave a comment... I read them all and love hearing from you!
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