Is it love?

I am a big believer in flow.  I know there is a sweet spot where life gets so easy and things just happen, I call this place flow.  In the past, I have noticed that I naturally go into a state of flow and then somehow come out of flow.  I have always assumed this is just part of flow - sometimes you are in it and sometimes you are not.  However, over the last few weeks as I have worked on using my will power to decide not to suffer, I notice that I am in a new type of flow... an easy flow.

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In the past, I have easily been in flow, but it has felt exciting and cool.  I am able to get things I just thought about with no effort; they magnetize into my life.  However, lately, I have noticed that there is another type of flow that is even easier, it is simply being in the moment, without suffering and either giving or receiving love.  Life gets very easy when we a) get present b) decide not to take anything too seriously (i.e., not suffer) and c) show up to either give love or receive the love that is coming towards us.  It is a very simple, amazingly powerful, practice.  It is my new definition of a practice with flow.

In each moment, after you have become completely present and you have decided not to suffer (read my blog post, but basically, you are stopping the story in your mind that is narrating what is happening and how it is terrible), you simply ask yourself, "is this love?".  In that moment, you become aware of whether or not your behavior or the other person/people's behavior is aligned with love.  If it is, you simply enjoy (savor) the moment.  If it is not, you do nothing.  If you are in a situation which is not aligned with love, or you are about to act in a moment, when you are not aligned with love, the best thing to do is to completely STOP and find your own way back to love.  Love is a place within you.  It is place of incredible power.  It is a never-ending source and supply of peace and joy.  And, if you are about to take an action or react to another person's action, from anyplace other than Love, nothing good will come of it.  So, just stop and ask yourself, "what do I need to do right now to re-align with love?"  What I noticed from my practice, is just asking that question usually re-aligns me with love.

I have noticed that I and many of the people I talk to spend a lot of time thinking about, reacting to, analyzing other people's actions and deciding what we need to do about it.  I have also noticed, that the people around me spend a lot of time giving me love, but sometimes, I don't understand that is what they are doing.  Imagine if you couldn't stand peanut butter and someone offered you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich everyday.  We immediately think that is annoying, because "they should know" I don't like peanut butter.  But in reality, they love peanut butter, and from a place of love, they are offering you the thing they love.  What would our lives be like if we just noticed the love behind the gesture?  Instead of reacting to the behavior, ask yourself, is this love?  If the answer is yes, then return the love.  You don't have to eat the sandwich, but you can appreciate the person for the love they are offering.  It's like when your cat offers you a half dead mouse or bird... is this love?  I personally do not enjoy the experience of being offered a half dead bird, but I can see the intent behind it.  What would it be like if we really became aware to what was being offered to us in every moment?

This is a newer practice I have been doing, but so far, I am blown away by how much love has been offered to me.  A friend of ours bought fireworks because they thought my niece and nephew were coming to visit.  I have been offered to go on a trip to Mexico and Greece.  Another person has offered to design a t-shirt for me.  The list just goes on and on... it is all love.  I am offered so much love every.single.day.  And, now that I am "seeing" it, I see it has always been this way for me.  I think of all the guys I dated that were not enough this, or too much that, and I think, wow, I missed so many offerings of love.

This month, I invite you to join me.  Grab your favorite pair of love goggles and put them on and start noticing what love offers you receive.  Just notice the love that already exists.  Whether it is concert tickets to your favorite band, or a half eaten bird by your cat, notice the love behind the offering.  And, at the same time, notice your reactions.  Notice when you suffer and need to "defend" yourself.  Notice, am I in a state of love right now?  If the answer is no, PAUSE.  There is nothing more powerful than the PAUSE.  Just hit PAUSE and wait.  Take a breath.  Take a walk.  Watch the sunset.  Re-connect to love. Then address the situation.  You will notice that when you address a situation from a place of love, you are more honest, more direct, more kind, and more clear.  Love is not a doormat.  Love is a powerful force.  And, using love to navigate life puts you in the relaxing, peaceful state of flow.

I hope you join me in this practice of giving and receiving love.  The goal is to always be doing one or the other of those activities.  And, as with everything we do, it is a practice.  Celebrate each time you PAUSE before sending the text or PAUSE before opening your mouth and asked instead, "WWLD" - What would love do?