What you resist, persists

Here's why it's wise to say "Yes" to whatever life throws at you. Psychologically speaking, resistance and resolution are at opposite poles. ... Quite the opposite. Long ago, the depth psychologist Carl Jung contended that “what you resist not only persists, but will grow in size.”

It's a Sunday in America and the news feed is abuzz with NFL players, standing or not, for the National Anthem - and what it means.  I am watching with deep fascination, as I like to when people give their argument for opposing views.  One news commentator talks about the financial impact to the players as ratings will drop due to their actions.  Hmmmm... financial impact... that is exactly why the Protestors who destroy property, destroy property - so that there is a financial impact, so that they will be heard.  Two very different sides of the issue, same conclusion, do something with financial impact so the other side will "get the message".

What most people don't realize is what they think the "other" group should do or not do, is just a reflection on what they are or are not doing.

When you point a finger at another person (or group), you point four back at you.  What you think the other person/group should be doing, is EXACTLY the thing you/your group is NOT DOING.

Each time someone comments on the other group, they entrench themselves deeper into the position from which they need healing. A Course in Miracles says, "Only what you are not giving can be lacking in any situation."  If you are seeing lack, it informs me that there is an area where you are resisting, and therefore not giving of yourself fully.  In the areas where you are fully giving, you do not comment, because you do not see lack. 

Unfortunately, we are living in a time where we so want someone else (anyone else, really) to fix these problems for us.  And, the truth, over and over again, is that only as we change will the problems around us change (and fix themselves).  If you are not happy with an aspect of your life, the best thing you can do is neutralize your judgment of it.  That is when a miracle can emerge and a new way of being with that area of your life can show itself.

Let me be clear.  This is NOT the time to DO nothing.  This is the time to take inspired, aligned action to add to the solution, not the swirl.  This is not the time to stop watching the news; to turn a blind eye; to not get involved because it is so toxic... this is the time to jump in fully, but jump in with a strong heart, a clear mind, and jump in to create a better solution that uplifts everyone involved for the highest good.  This is definitely our time.  This is the time to take meaningful action.  Meaningful action comes from a place of peaceful love and true desire to heal, not from a place of pointing out the "right way" to the solution.  If you are reading this blog, you probably know and have known... this is Our Time more than ever.  The world has been waiting for us.  And, as such, we have a strong responsibility to take meaningful action that at the least, causes no harm.  And, at the most, transforms the situation into a place of love and healing.

Here is a spiritual practice to help you release your attachment to what "should" happen so that there is space for a miracle.  This is very much in line with Byron Katie's the work and a Course in Miracles, looking for a change in perception.

1.  Identify a person or group who is "not doing it right".
2.  Take a piece of paper and fold it in half length-wise. 
3.  On the left hand side, write sentences about what the person is or is not doing.  Write at least three sentences, leaving a bit of space between each of them.
4.  On the right hand side, write how you are either doing or not doing the EXACT same thing.  In order to come up with these, think about where you are holding back because you think someone else should.  Where you are holding back, when written down, is a huge release that will allow for a miracle to come into the situation.
5.  Take ownership for your behavior, and allow the miracle to emerge.

Here are some examples:

Column 1:  What they are or are not doing


1.  My boss should not ask me to work late if they are she is not staying late too.

2.  My partner should remember to do the errands I ask them to do.


3.  NFL players should NOT take a knee for the national anthem to show respect for our nation.

4.  Our President should care more about the needs of the people.

5.  My family should support me in getting the bills paid.

Column 2: How I am or am not doing that same thing

1.  I should not ask my boss to stay late in order to do a good job.

2. I should remember to do the things my partner asks me to do, for example, remind him of the errands I need done this week.

3.  I should allow freedom of expression for other Americans as a show of respect for our nation.

4.  I should do more to care for the people of the world.

5.  I should support my family by prioritizing getting the bills paid.